laugh at life with gillie

Our neighbours cat came in our garden to have his daily shit, When he saw I'd concreted it I thought he'd have a fit.

I had a parrot that swore a lot, he wasn't very pleasant, He escaped out of the window one day and raped a passing pheasant.

Hickory Dickory Dock . Hickory, dickory, dock, the mouse ran up the clock. The clock struck one the mouse ran down,  I hit it with a weighted sock. :0)  :0\ well they are vermin :0| I see the moon. I see the moon, the moon see's me, having a pee up the old oak tree, who's is that moon that I can see? It's the Mrs crouching next to me.

Posh bloke said my English is atrocious.  I said at least I don't put people down, so I'm not condementing. My Granddad shot to fame as a human canon ball. My mrs hasn't got a dirty mind, she changes it too much. The older I get the more the circles I move around in are full of dizzy old folks. Our village idiot isn't a patch on London's City Idiot. I worked my way up through life from nothing and now I have got next to nothing. I am always politicly correct; just like my fellow honky white brothers. Cross a bird with a fish and you get a Cock Roach. Too many beans blow holes in your jeans. People drink to your health and you wake up with a blinding headache the next day. There has been a crime spree in the kiddies nursery... Tom,Tom the Pipers Son and Taffy the Welshman are chief suspects. I taught myself everything ... I think I need a new teacher.

The Boring-est Bore that makes my ears sore Is the sad person who's so materialistic. They get lots of debt, then start to fret when they become a bad credit statistic