laugh at life with gillie

        I have jumped a few years now; just to prove that those rumours about my having short term memory loss are a complete fabrication; as spread by myself when I forget someone’s birthday.   A year after I lost my pretty wife to cancer I started going out and mixing with other people.  I had not frequented the Bag 'o' Rats public house since my bachelor days.  My old school mates were still using it because most of them were either lifelong bachelors or divorcees.    Gorgeous George (so called because he thought he was!) was in there; his wife divorced him because of his roaming eyes.  I had my own squint operated on when I was 15 years old and it is now straight, but Georges are uncontrollable; unless the surgeons took them out all together.   However, he would still have his roving hands and a good excuse to touch every woman who spoke to him - accidentally on purpose of course-.   Anyway,...

This is written by a typical Englishman (Not got a Cockney accent. Not posh, unrecognisable as a Hollywood Englishman is, but a born Englishman; Me). I have noticed through the years that Hollywood often typecast us and other people around the world, for good or bad. I am not having a go at our American cousins, just Hollywood.   It is about 3 asshole villains and one asshole Ass who decide to steal children's presents' and booby trap them with high explosives. The 3 villains are led by a posh surly Englishman who says "Old boy" a lot, so that the ALL AMERICAN HERO can take the piss. The surly posh Englishman's right- hand man is an Arrogant Blond Haired German - with dueling scar -, who says, "Rouse" and "Nine a lot. They are followed by a scruffy little Mexican with a manic laugh and a twitchy eye who rides everywhere on a stubborn Ass that bites children.  They are hunted by an L.A.P.D. Officer with the morally high sta...

  Uncle Cyril was accidentally mentioned in dispatches. He wasn't a very good soldier, as he couldn't even grasp how to use a compass.  Nevertheless, he was mentioned for a heroic act.  He was always in trouble during training and tried to hide his fear by joking and laughing about everything. The drill sergeant hated him, 'That mans a crackpot!' he yelled to the commanding officer in his drill sergeants voice   The C.O's ears were ringing; but he thought he had heard him correctly and wrote down on Uncle Cyril's record "This man  is a Crack Shot". so with those words on his record he was presented with a cross rifles insignia to wear on his battledress sleeve and they made him company sniper.  He was given a choice of weapon and went for a Bren gun just so that he never missed. Although his superiors wondered why he wanted to run around with a bloody great Bren gun they let him have his own way.  The fateful day came w...