Scandal in the Nursery... Rhyme.

Mary had a little Lamb. they blamed it on the Ram,
 
 But!  hey diddle diddle the cat had a fiddle and the cow jumped over the moon,
 
 "why you do that?" she asked the cat, Clear off you feline loon.
 
   Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, in a bad way, he'd taken a fall, so he wasn't getting involved.
 
 Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet then the mouse ran up her frock,
 
The clock struck 1 , 2, 3, and 4 as she sat there in deep shock.
 
Big Jack Horner sat in the Corner eating all the pies.
 
He says that he is not obese but then he tells such lies.
 
Jack Spratt could eat no fat, so he gave it to Jack Horner,
 
Horner said, 'If you don't want that, just toss it in my corner
Tom, Tom the pipers son stole Jacks Spratt's creamy bun.
 
The farmer came in, with a gun, (he'd lost a pig)
 
and sent the pipers son on the run.
 
Little Bo Peep lost her sheep,
 
She was upset cos they don't come cheap.
 
But, the evidence was there piled in a heap,
 
of bones in the Horner corner.
 
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get a pail of water,
 
Now they have 3 little boys and are trying for a daughter.
 
 

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